Sunday, July 22, 2012

A Rather Long Update

I guess it's time to finally update this thing called a blog...

We're expecting! I'm 24 weeks, and I am in complete awe over this pregnancy. This pregnancy, from human estimation, wasn't supposed to happen. I'll explain that in a bit. We're pretty sure that we're having a boy, and we're thrilled and so thankful that he appears to be healthy! I wish there was a better word for thankful because what I feel is so much stronger than "thankful." When I think about that fact that we actually got pregnant, I'm amazed. When I think about that fact that I've made it this far, that I'm already over half way to full term, it takes my breath away. For a very long time, I doubted that I'd ever be this pregnant. And when I feel this sweet, little miracle move inside of me, my heart feels like it's going to explode with love and gratefulness. I already love this baby more than I can put into words, more than I can even comprehend. I marvel everyday over the miracle that we're experiencing. Because no matter how you look at it, this baby is a miracle. Not to downplay the miracle that any child is, but this baby is a special kind of miracle. Like I said before, this baby wasn't supposed to happen, at least humanly speaking. We were told a little over a year ago by our fertility doctor that we had a 1-2% chance of ever getting pregnant on our own. Let me see if I can put that into perspective...Statistically speaking, most young, healthy couples have a 85-90% chance of getting pregnant within a year of trying. That's one year...85-90%. Those are really good odds, and the majority of couples achieve pregnancy within 3-6 months of trying. We were told that we had a 1-2% chance of ever getting pregnant. Not in a year, but ever. We decided to give fertility treatments a try, which according to the doctor might bump our chances of conceiving to 4-10%. Better, but still not great. We did 7 months of fertility treatments, and at some point during the 7th month we talked about stopping and giving ourselves a break. At that point, we were getting ready to move, and our "new" house needed (and still needs) a good amount of work. Fertility treatments play with your hormones. That's how that do what they do. They do crazy, mean things to your hormones and send them all out of whack. Out-of-whack hormones do crazy, mean things to your emotions, which in turn play with your mind. It's a roller coaster. So after 7 months, we decided to get off that roller coaster for a while, give ourselves a break from trying to get pregnant, and focus on the house. We started praying that God would clearly direct us towards our next step. Our fertility doctor was pushing IVF and told us that it would be our best, and possibly only, chance of conceiving. We weren't quite at peace with going that direction, so we prayed that whatever door we were supposed to walk through would be clearly and obviously open and that we would have total peace when we walked through that door. I got pregnant the next month. Talk about clear and obvious! Getting pregnant was the first hurdle. Staying pregnant was the next. Because of my past miscarriages, I am at a much higher risk of miscarrying again, so my doctor started me on progesterone supplementation right away. Progesterone is the hormone that sustains a pregnancy, and if a woman's body doesn't make enough of it, she can't carry the pregnancy. So, my doctor wanted me to take the progesterone until I was through the first trimester. Thankfully, my body responded really well to it, and here we are! 24 weeks. 16 weeks to go, give or take a couple weeks. Crazy! I love being pregnant. I love my cute baby bump...which, by the way, took forever to show up. I was beginning to think I'd never get one! I love feeling this baby move, and I love the look on Craig's face when he is able to feel him move. To date, it's the most amazing thing I've ever experienced. I can't wait until he's here, and I pray every day that he arrives safely and is healthy. I also pray that we will love and teach him well. I can't wait to be a mom, and I'm so thankful for this truly amazing, truly miraculous gift. I feel so blessed. So beyond blessed.

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